Stand Alone

Sometimes I find it necessary to stand alone and to have time to myself that is largely uninterrupted by anything external.

In the early 80's Sony came up with the Walkman -- countless technology generations later have brought us a variety of mp3 players. There was a period in school when we adults were supposed to become outraged at the sight of a student in the halls or in class surreptitiously listening to music while the important business of school went on around the now oblivious victim. Older adults, especially, went off volcanically at the sight. How dare these young know-nothings ignore us? I was always of two minds. I understand using music or some other noise to create a barrier that permits in just as much as is wanted and no more. Once when I was younger, my family visited my Grandparents in Detroit. Granddad always sat in front of the TV with headphones on. . . only, I complained to my own father, "They aren't plugged into anything!" It was his polite and not-too-subtle way of asking for some peace. A little later, talking in the kitchen with a grandfather-in-law, I told him his wife was calling from the other room. I thought I was being helpful because he didn't have his hearing aid in, but had left it in the TV room in plain sight of Grandma. "I know, I can hear just fine." It turns out that he'd gotten the hearing aid so he could take it out and pretend like he couldn't hear -- creating a little space for himself. My favorite island-carving activity used to be reading; caught up in a good book, it was possible to ignore what went on around me. For many reasons, this no longer works and I find myself seeking quiet in remote places away from friends and acquaintances.

I guess the real question here is why do we need to create this space, virtual or actual, around ourselves. How is it so many of us need this to be human?